I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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