Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
