I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
Randomize