thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize
