Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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