see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
Randomize
