what day is it and did you see me today?
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
