69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize