Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
