So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
third nipple confirmed
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
Randomize
