Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
