worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
Please don't give away my fajitas
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Randomize
