I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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