Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Randomize