No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
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