I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Randomize
