2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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