my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Randomize