I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
Randomize