I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
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