Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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