oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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