new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
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