woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Randomize
