The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
