WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
Randomize