Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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