found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
You are a booty call, not a friend.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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