You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
