Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
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