whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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