So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Randomize
