sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
