you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
