Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
