You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
