I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
home. puking in laundry basket.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
Randomize
