life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
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