I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
false alarm, still single
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
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