Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
of course. lets lasso hookers.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
I look excited, but its just a facade.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize
