OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Randomize
