marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
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