Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
Nicole vs. Life
why did i make a hit list last night containing only McDonalds?
you tried to order a magarita mcflurry and when they said they didnt make those you tried to call 911
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
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