I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
Congratulations! We have a period
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