she kept yelling 'call me bella'
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Randomize
