I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
Randomize
