I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
false alarm. still invincible.
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
I lost the right to judge tonight
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Randomize
