Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
