i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
