what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
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