Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
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